I was on a trip with my sister, looking at houses, and listening to her GPS give directions. Hers is a bottom of the barrel cheapie they bought off Woot! some time back. It gets the job done often enough, though. New housing developments would give just about any GPS the fits until the streets are uploaded into the database.

But it was the little stuff like “In. One hundred. Fifty. Yards. Straight. Ahead” immediately followed by “Straight. Ahead” that had us all cracking up and joking about the other features a GPS should have.

1. “Where the. Hell. Are You. Going?”

Considering how often we did something other than follow its directions, I’d just love to see one ask that once in a while. Instead it kept trying to get us to turn around.

2. “I’m Lost.”

Ever just want the GPS to admit it? Sometimes it gave us far more complicated directions than necessary to get where we were going.

3. Impatient tone of voice.

Even it it doesn’t start swearing at you, to just have the GPS sound impatient when you miss a turn would make it more interesting. Maybe that’s just me.

4. Scenic detours.

Be fun to tell the GPS that you have time to stop off for interesting sites. It would be really wonderful on vacation.

5. Begs to return to favorite location.

Go somewhere a lot? Have your GPS keep asking when you’re going back. Sounds fun for favorite vacation places and such… just don’t teach it to love your workplace that much!

All in all, it’s just that I want them to have personality. Sure it would be annoying at times, but probably not boring.